How I can give advice on a happy life, who is such a negative and miserable person, you ask? Well, I have done my fair share of research about the subject, and I am pretty confident that these things can make your life a little better (or at least not worse!). These are the things that I am working on to try and have the best life I can right now.
It doesn’t matter what you do, as long as you do something! Did you know that sitting still is worse than smoking? As for myself, I work from home and if I am not aware, I can sit still for most of the day without moving at all. This does not make me feel good, and if I have a day like that I feel rotten inside. But, it is easy to avoid! Take a walk, do some Yoga, or just some stretching, go for a run, or go to the gym. I have never in my whole life regretted a workout, and I don’t think I have ever been in a bad mood after an exercise. For real!! Give it a try, and see how it makes you feel. For me exercise is natural antidepressants.
Good sleep is essential to feeling good, at least in my book. A bad nights sleep can ruin my day. And a few nights in a row – even worse. For the most part of my adult life I have had some issues with sleeping. I take forever to fall asleep. I can be dread tired all day long, and as soon as its bed time I am wide awake! As soon as I turn the lights off, my brain switches on full speed. Extremely annoying, and really hard to turn around. Believe me I have tried!! But, there are a lot of advice out there on how to switch off your brain for bedtime, and how to sleep better. I recommend a google search, and try out what works for you.
As for me I have found a temporary solution that actually works for the time being (hurray!). I found it in the book ‘The power of now’ by Eckhart Tolle. Recommended!
This is something I need to get better at myself. I spend way too much time in front of a screen, either being my computer, Ipad or phone. I stare at the screen for about 8 hours everyday for work, and then I spend a lot of my spare time doing the same. Like writing this blog, reading other blogs, watching tv-series, or just scrolling through social media. I am used to constant stimulation from electric devices, and as soon as I have 5 seconds to spare, I grab my phone to “check if something’s happened”. I try to force myself off this habit, and I have for example deleted the Facebook app from my phone. Instead of spending time on the internet, I think it’s good to log off and do other stuff. Like just listening to some music while reading, drawing or writing (with an actual pen on an actual piece of paper!). Colouring books for adults is a great way to log off and take a timeout. Or go for a walk. Call a friend. Maybe some meditation? I’m not very experienced on this, but sometimes I test some guided meditation sessions that I find with my good friend Google. This one I tried the other day, and it made me feel pretty good. Why don’t you give it a go: 10 Minutes To Positive Thinking: Guided Meditation
As an introvert, talking is not my strong suite. I like listening more than talking, and I can find it hard to communicate in words. That’s why I like to write instead, and always used to write long letters and emails to friends/boyfriends/family if there was something I needed to say. But… I do like to have conversations about deeper things, although it happens rarely. To talk about the universe, the meaning of life, love, feelings, the world, religion or what not, is something that I enjoy. But only if I feel safe and confident, and with the right person in the right setting. But, I want to try to do it more often, and become more comfortable with it. Its great to open your mind as you think, talk and discuss. I think it can give you great pleasure at a deeper level.
Puuuh… this is also a hard one for me at times. I am very happy in my own company, and would much rather be on my own that with people I don’t know very well. You can read more about my social awkwardness in my earlier blogpost here. But, it’s no secret that near relations does a lot for one’s happiness. This I realise. And there is no better thing than to enjoy time in company of good friends or family with good food and wine. That is definitely one of my favorite things to do.
Hugs and kisses
Research actually shows that hugging is extremely effective at healing sickness, disease, loneliness, depression, anxiety and stress. How wonderful is that! Me for one loves hugs and cuddles. One of my favorite thing is to go to bed snuggling up to my boyfriend, and waking up in the same way. I have recently read that hugs are a lot like meditation and laughter. They all help us to be present in the moment, to get you out of circular thinking patterns and connect with your heart and your feelings.
This might sound as a bit of a cliche, but I can only speak for myself, and this has helped me alot. I’m naturally quite a negative person, and it is so easy for me to go on a downward spiral of negative thoughts. To dig myself a big hole, crawl into it and bade in my own misery. But to identify your negative thoughts is the first step towards letting it go, so that is step one. I try to be a lot more aware of my own thoughts, and if I find myself being negative I try to turn it around, or think about something else. To be grateful is also a good help to overcome negative thoughts. Every night I try to think about what I am grateful for from that day, and what I have to look forward to the next day. Or, if nothing else works; Fake it ’til you make it!